Archive for January, 2010

18
Jan

thinking friends

   Posted by: pamela    in musings

Today I am struck by how my community of friends are people who think. But, even more than that, they live out their thinking. In the last 24 hours I have had conversation about a great movie I saw with two friends, read an email exchange between two other friends, responded to a friend trying to figure out her way in life, and am in the midst of an essay on life that another friend wrote. The facilitator of each conversation is different – a movie, a tv series, one’s future, and life in a region destroyed by strife. Yet, regardless of the facilitator, the conversations are filled with depth – tribal attitudes and cross-cultural adaptation, freedom of life in God and not should’ing on oneself, what brings a friend joy and fulfillment, and whether or not God is good and worthy of being trusted.

I do not have much patience for sitting around and talking philosophy. I do not like abstract thoughts that do not return to reality. Idealism is beautiful until destroyed by reality. What I love about these conversations is that my friends are thinking and are sharing their struggles with others, we are all growing, and life is being lived in amongst these conversations. These things are not being wrestled with as abstract thoughts, but as a real part of who we are as we face life. This is beautiful and I consider myself blessed to have such thinking friends.

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9
Jan

a winter wedding retreat

   Posted by: pamela    in life

The weekend before Christmas I had the honor of participating in a Winter Wedding Retreat – a small, intimate, multi-day wedding celebration. Every time I have sat down to write this, I have ended up at a loss of words. Not because there is little to say, but precisely the opposite – there is so much to say, and so little of it can be said in words, but only captured in the wholeness of the weekend. I hope that this shares some of that beauty.

26 of us – family and friends – gathered at Renee’s family home and two nearby cottages on the shores of Lake Michigan Friday through Sunday. We each came with our own story and our own connection to Renee and Kylie. Everyone had someone new to meet, and yet each was an integral part of their community, and as a whole we represented a much larger community gathering around them to celebrate and support their marriage. At the weekend’s close, we could honestly call each other friends.

As for me, I met Renee ten and a half years ago as a freshman in university. We were instant kindred spirits and have since then spent years living and laughing together. We have weathered tempests of storms and soaked in the calmest of waters together. I love  Renee and Kylie’s story – what it is and what it will be – but that is for them to tell. What I can tell you is that they were made for each other and that I am blessed to be a part of their community.

I flew in a day and a half early to help with wedding prep – buying food and wine, making welcome baskets for the cabins, fixing a few beads on the wedding dress, soaking in the hot tub, and talking with Renee late into the night. Then the we did the airport runs. So much contentment in welcoming loved ones. Then the celebration began.

Pizza and pasta dinner surrounded by graffitied brick walls. Touching stories, laughter, and tears shared as a group. Morning devotions and prayer led by Grandma and Grandpa, who have been married for 55 years. The picture perfect dusting of snow. The men bonded over laser tag and lunch out. The women stayed in for relaxation for a simple spa time, mimosas, and lunch. The living space was rearranged three times in a night – for a wedding ceremony at sunset, a Thai dinner, and a dance floor. The bride was stunning and the groom handsome. They committed themselves to each other in marriage. There were tears shed and there were smiles filled with joy.  And on Sunday we gathered once more for a large brunch – one last meal over which to linger before goodbyes. It was a blessed time.

I have heard people say of weddings, “That was a good party.” And this was a good party – but not in an out until 3 am kind of way. It was good because we all left wishing we could stay longer and yet our hearts were content. It was good because we truly celebrated Renee and Kylie’s marriage – not just the act of the wedding, but their marriage. It was good because we celebrated as community. It was so good.

My camera was put away during the actual wedding and evening celebrations, so I have no glamorous photos of the couple in their wedding best. But Saturday morning I headed outside with the two of them to get some pictures with the freshly fallen, perfect dusting of snow. I hope you can see their joy.

r&k4

r&k3

r&k2

r&k1

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4
Jan

books of 2009

   Posted by: pamela    in books

Lately I have found myself wanting to read more and yet not making the time to curl up with books. There is plenty waiting to be read on my shelves and I am looking forward to working through those and others in the coming year. What were your favorite books of 2009? Is there anything that I should be adding to my shelves for this coming year? I would love to hear your thoughts.

For now, this is the list of books read this past year. Many of them have separate blog entries, but sometimes I was lazy and never got around to updating. Let me know if you would like to know more about any of these.

  • A Painted House by John Grisham
  • The Island of the Colorblind by Oliver Sacks
  • Presenting to Win by Jerry Weissman
  • Generation Y and the New Rules of Management by Mark Murphy and Andrea Burgio-Murphy
  • Not Everyone Gets a Trophy: How to Manage Generation Y by Bruce Tulgan
  • The Chains of Heaven by Philip Marsden
  • The Bookseller of Kabul by Asne Seierstad
  • The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni
  • Overcoming the Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni
  • Walking on Water: Reflections on Faith and Art by Madeline L’Engle
  • Praying for Sheetrock by Melissa Fay Greene
  • When Helping Hurts: How to Alleviate Poverty without Hurting the Poor…or Yourself by Steve Corbett & Brian Fikkert
  • Treasure by Clive Cussler
  • Hunter by J.A. Hunter
  • The Sharper Your Knife, the Less You Cry: Love, Laughter, and Tears in Paris at the World’s Most Famous Cooking School by Kathleen Flinn
  • Death by Meeting by Patrick Lencioni
  • Tribes by Seth Gordin
  • Unaccustomed Earth by Jhumpa Lhairi
  • Mountains Beyond Mountains: The Quest of Dr. Paul Farmer, a Man Who Would Cure the World by Tracy Kidder
  • A Wrinkle in Time by Madeline L’Engle
  • Balzac and the Little Chinese Seamstress by Dai Sijie
  • A Short History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson
  • It Sucked and Then I Cried: How I had a Baby, a Breakdown, and a Much Needed Margarita by Heather Armstrong
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